Tuesday, February 28, 2012

The great unwatched - Unemployment and a raging Head cold

So two things happened; I mean, a billion things happen all the time, microscopic doo dads floating round the atmosphere (I learned year 10 Science), but two things more relevant happend to me, Sam J Rankin, in 2012. I left my current job with a week in between of unemployment, and I got a raging head cold. 

I've only spent three weeks on the Dole, including a lovely appearance at the Bendigo Centrelink where I heard a chap scream at his female companion "I'm fucked off cos I've picked up two people from prison today and it's only 11 am!", a common grievance of any modern gentleman.

So too be fair, I need to experience as much unemployment in a week as I can. Combine this with my sinuses slowly filling up with cement, and we have...

Tea and tracksuits - Diary of an unemployed. 

Day 1  - 

I can never sleep in that well so I just lie in bed holding my eyes shut. I get up and discover ANTS! There's a fried rice box in the bin and since I don't have any insect repellant I swat at them with a duspan. They spread and and a handful die. I walk away from scene and practice my reaction to "Sam, there's ants in our room!" It's a sigh of annoyance and a simply "Really? Shit..." Nothing too over the top

One the way to the supermarket I practice my argument with Kim Kardashian in my head. It goes like this

KK: So why are we bad, Sam? We're making a living like anyone else in Entertainment
SJR: But your not creating anything, your not producing content.
KK: But we are the content, people find our lives interesting.
SJR: But that's not true, is it. Your "storylines" have been obviously given to you by a producer. The one where Scott just buys a piano? Really?
KK: I guess... I'll stop. Your right.
Christopher Hitchens (from the grave) - Sam, your so cool and clever! Let's hang out and make fun of Christians.

2:13 pm
I watch 12 Monkey's with Brad Pitt and Bruce Willis. It is not very good. But then I watch Starship Troopers to make sure nostalgia hasn't killed my dream movies. It is excellent. Phew!

To be continued...

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